When Vera Brittain, in her Testament of Youth (a volume which stirred at least one university campus "as no other book in recent years"), admits that, while fifteen years ago she would have turned to a prayer-book for solace in the bereavement of her fiancé, today she would find comfort in Bertrand Russell’s philosophies, her confession typifies the wide revolt against the morality of our Christian faith.
The following pages have been written to record a protest against this growing disparagement of Scriptural ethics and to help stem the onrushing tide which champions the pagan, despiritualized interpretation of courtship, marriage, and family relations.
We find a host of counselors today who "look at marriage." The doctor, the psychologist, the psychiatrist, the psychoanalyst, the biologist, the anthropologist, the sociologist, the Communist, the radical novelist, the Hollywood strategist — all have beheld marriage with a professional scrutiny; but they have given no trustworthy direction for the attainment of genuine and permanent marital happiness. Too often their overemphasis of the physical, their bias, skepticism, or venom, have remained utterly undisguised.
More than ever before, then, the Church must look at marriage and in the spirit of its Lord and Savior offer as the basis for all family felicity the truths of divine revelation found within the covers of our Bible. The application of Biblical principles is not only highly concordant with the best results of sociological research, but has been demonstrated in unnumbered homes; for our Christian faith, with its eminently practical endowments, bestows those definite helps for the attainment of the higher happiness in married life: the presence of the redeeming Christ and His renewing Spirit, the strength of His purifying Word, the power of His sustaining Sacrament, and His pledge of answered prayer.
This volume is essentially a code of Christian marriage, drawn from the Scriptures, which would help to make marriage "for better, not for worse"; and it is offered particularly to the mature young people of the Christian Church, those alert, eager young men and women who after their high-school or college years may find themselves confronted by some of the problems which these pages would help solve. For fifteen years it has been my privilege to edit the Walther League Messenger, the young people's organ of my Church. Many of the personal questions that have been repeatedly voiced in the extended editorial correspondence of this decade and a half have not only suggested this volume, but have also helped to formulate its presentation. From contact with youth groups throughout the land, from private consultation with students, and from personal inquiries that have been submitted in connection with chain broadcasts I believe that the problems discussed in these chapters are among the major perplexities which confront our young people, and I have endeavored to give the Church's answer in a non-technical, practical manner.
Sometimes, it seems, the study of marriage is restricted to snatched bits of hazy theories or guided by conventions and eclipsed by absorbing, but momentary issues. In other, less complicated days, when Christian marital ideals were uncontested, this neglect may have produced no serious consequences; but today, when every major claim for Christian morality has been fiercely assailed, ignorance of the Scriptural injunctions and disregard of Christ's sustaining power become doubly hazardous. I am convinced that in the broad educational outlines for young people there should be adequate room for the constructive study of marriage blessings and problems. For what is a young woman profited if she can speak authoritatively on Byzantine art, yet has no definite understanding of the high principles of Christian home-life? Or what advantage does a young man enjoy who can quote Homer and Vergil in the original and still is woefully unprepared for the personal issues of the family? The increasing frequency with which courses on marriage appear in the curricula of American colleges shows that even worldly wisdom has been aroused to the necessity of premarital preparation. But since the Church offers more than academic information when it presents the divine will and the help of Heaven, its guidance along the pathway to domestic happiness is doubly imperative. The future of our Church and of our country depends, under God, upon stalwart, Christian homes, consecrated Christian families, the exaltation of the Christian doctrines concerning marriage, parenthood, and home. And how can these truths be more effectively inculcated than by a systematic program, designed to make these truths vital, decisive forces in the hearts and lives of our young people?
I gratefully acknowledge the assistance rendered by two members of the Concordia Seminary Faculty, Prof. Th. Engelder, D. D., and Prof. E. J. Friedrich, who read the book in manuscript and offered helpful suggestions and improvements. Pastor Alfred Doerffler reviewed the manuscript, and Miss Harriet Schwenk offered generous assistance in the preparation for printing. The cooperation of Concordia Publishing House deserves recognition.
To the pastors who have answered questionnaires and to all those whose opinions have been sought and generously given I herewith extend my thanks.
I ask no greater blessing for these pages than that, by the grace of God, they may lead some of tomorrow's fathers and mothers to resolve in their marital relations that whatsoever they do in word or deed they "do all in the name of the Lord Jesus."
Independence Day, 1935
It has been a distinct pleasure to be able to prepare these pages for the third time. The entire book is reworked. The presentation is frequently expanded and in some cases emphasized; much new material has been added as additional illustration; wherever possible, the references have been brought up to date.
So that the new edition would not become appreciably larger, some of the material of the previous printings has been condensed.
Comments from readers are particularly welcome.
We ask God to bless the new edition, so that it may help bring Christ into many homes and assist our young people in planning their married lives for better with Him, instead of for worse without Him!
Thanksgiving Day, 1939 Walter A. Maier